Cinnamon Noir by the West Coast Candle company REVIEW

And we're back with another crucial strip-mall candle review. Today in the hot seat we have Cinnamon Noir by the West Coast Candle company. These guys have clearly moved onto a new branding strategy since the release of this, as their website is now just a collage of puppy photos and impactful quotes such as "Every order supports animal rescues, and every candle or wax melt saves one baby sea turtle."

So I can only presume the candles must smell as wholesome as the saccharin sentiment the brand is so hoping to invoke, as if one's heartstrings are being yanked by a gang of drunk campanologists.

Back to Cinnamon Noir, which sounds like a terrible Sin City sequel, even worse than the second, even though Eva Green got 'em out in that.

We make clean-burning candles and melts that smell incredible — without the toxins.

Let's take a look at the note profile. Cinnamon, Fir Needle. Red Apple, Vanilla.

This candle was doomed from the start. It only had one usable wick for half of it which created a lopsided effect. I guess you have to check candles for prominent wicks like you check egg boxes for bust eggs*.

I want to know two things. What makes this Cinnamon 'noir' and where does the 026 come from? Does it take 26 times to spell Cinnamon correctly without the spellchecker? Maybe it was the 26th guy in the pitch meeting that knew the literal translation of Noir, and that's only because he was either French or an Art student.

OK moving from the name. I personally didn't get much joy from this candle, but I paid 6 bucks so I won't be returning it to the shops. Although can you return a candle once you've burnt right through it? Let me Google. Shockingly, the answer is no. But hold on, one company has a more lenient slant on this;

Bath & Body Works, have generous policies allowing exchanges for disliked scents even after burning (often with a receipt), while many other smaller or specialized candle companies will only accept used candles if they are faulty or damaged.

God is that 300 words yet? Ok, let's keep going. Is it MANLY? Huh? Is Cinnamon a manly smell? Personally there are only 3 manly smells that I consider on the Mount Rushmore of manliness. Boat Diesel, (Cuban Cigar preferably lit inside a Huey helicopter with the cast of Predator) and the smell of my Barbour jacket after Bonfire night. Cinnamon does not crack my top ten of manly smells, but according to this Reddit article, it's big in the US.

In Europe, it's (Cinnamon) associated with mulled wine and Xmas time. It's not as common as in the States where cinnamon is everywhere (Cinnabon, chewing gum, soap, etc.).

Ok you get the idea. Tune in next week where I light another candle and try and stretch out 500 words for the sake of content.

*Bust eggs. Good name for my dark introspective cookery-themed poetry novella.