I've Hung Around Successful People for Ten Years Here's What I learned

Article by guest author Peter Brooker

I don't claim to be rich nor successful, although I have had several TOP TIPS published in Viz Comic over the years. (Don't call me a hero). But I am a student of people. I love people watching, and picking up habits on how to improve my own life. When hanging around successful people, from a variety of circles and captains of industry afforded to me largely by my wife, a CFO of an oil and gas company, here are some of the character traits I've noticed.

Reply straight away

It's very obvious to me that when I reach out to a friend, who I assume has no time to reply to anything, they reply almost immediately. They also reply with a "YES" a lot more than my flakey friends who will sometimes hedge their bets with a 'might do,' or 'will let you know closer to the time.'

I'm telling you, when a successful person says yes, they mean it and they stick to their word. If they say no, they will tell you immediately so you can make plans accordingly. And they'll decline with grace.

Follow up

A successful person will always follow up after you've seen them. Commonly they might be at the airport, saying something like this..

In the lounge at Heathrow thinking about a great time I had with you. Thank you so much for your generosity, your hospitality and most of all your friendship. Like James Bond I will return so you better be there.

A follow up thank you note is always appreciated and keeps them in your thoughts.

TIP: I notice that successful people often dictate their messages with dictation on their phone. It sounds more authentic, and saves time ultimately.

Don't be cheap

The worst thing you can do as a poor person is be stingy. Yes money might be an issue if you're going out for drinks, but there are ways of settling the bill without getting the calculator out. For example, I always try to pick up the tab for a friend, and tell them that their money is no good here. Or, you're in my town now, you get the tab when I come to 'fill in the blank'.

I once had dinner with David Walliams who settled the dinner tab for around 16-20 people. Afterwards he would say, 'did you have enough to eat?' Knowing that we all stuffed our face. I thought that was classy.

Stay in shape

When you see someone in shape it means they're taking care of themselves, they have discipline, and probably have a better work ethic and overall energy about them. This kind of confident energy can be infectious at times. I'm not saying you have to be in shape to be successful, but people that are driven in life, often have the stamina mentally and physically. One begets the other.

Talk to the waiter

I notice nearly always when going out with successful people, (can I start calling them SP's?) that they take the time to talk to everyone. When someone brings a drink to the table, they might have a question about their accent, where they are from. They instill a level of humanity, breaking down any class divide and make them feel like they're interested in them. So take the time to compliment a member of staff on their hair, a tattoo, their style. It not only uplifts them, but people around you will notice you pay attention and are good to be around.

They Remember

I'm constantly amazed when anyone remembers me, let alone successful people who meet hundreds of people at parties and have an inexhaustible network of colleagues they've worked with over the decades. I notice they don't just remember my name, but remember the project I'm working on. I've learned two ways to help lock in names:

1. When people tell you their name, repeat it to them 'It's nice to meet you David. I actually had a best friend in school called David, kind of looked like you.' Everyone loves to hear their own name said back to them, and the more you say it in the conversation like, 'you know David, that's a great point,' the more you'll likely remember.

2. Make a note on your phone. I literally have a note on my phone that says NAMES> and then under each name I'll write a word or two about what pets they have, or what holiday they have planned. If I'm going to a party or jumping on a call with that person I can get a refresher on that note I wrote, and they'll be flattered to know I remembered.

Photo by Jessica Sysengrath on Unsplash