The Hellscape of being Stranded on a Floridian Airboat Tour

"These here parts get a little shallow".

These were the words our driver muttered before we birthed on a mud bank through the Okeechobee River in South Florida. I'm writing this article, because it's probably the closest I've come to death. And I've been in many car wrecks. This one was a day trip with my wife, two other couples, and two young children on an airboat run by the tour company XXX. I was debating whether to include their name in this article, but after the fact, and after much deliberation, I thought to hell with these guys.

My wife and I had done a couple of airboat tours, but only on this one did I genuinely feel any jeopardy. Yes we were pre warned about the shallow waters due to the drought. But I was personally unaware that this meant we would be stranded in a river, outside of the boat, teeming with alligators.

Once it was clear we were stuck, the driver to his credit got out of the airboat and tried to shift it himself. Of course to no avail. "Everybody off," came the cry. We all disembarked after taking our shoes and socks off. The women and children were ushered to the bank, the safest point. The men were sequestered to push the boat out of the mud into the shallows. Which we duly did after a while. The whole process was circa ten minutes. But let me tell you the killer.

Minutes before we got stuck, the driver told us "we're going round the bend here, there will be a mother alligator and her younglings. It gets shallow so hang on."

In the mud, I could see huge paw prints, the tracks of a big alligator. Just then a dark roar. Not really a roar, a guttural bellow. Something only an apex predator makes. We rush to the banks, everyone. Finally we scramble through the dark, deep mud and silt and clamber on the boat. I usher everyone through. My head on a swivel. I remember the line from Jaws as Quint says after surviving the Indianapolis, "that was the only time I was afraid, waiting my turn."

Made it to Headquarters. Everyone on the boat agreed we had done something special. We had a real adventure, but not the one we signed up for. Not 50 yards from where we got back on th boat we passed a 13 foot alligator.

Back at headquarters we hosed off our feet. Did we get a free beer? Did we get a discount? We all got our photo taken with our muddy feet. And got a 'welcome to Florida' from the owners. Who I'm sure are not bad people. But we did not sign up for the white knuckle ride. Yes it happens, boats get stuck in the shallows. Could the driver not have done a recce of the river before our tour to see if it was safe?

Could he have at least extended the tour once we got back on the boat? The tour was an hour long, we were stuck in the mud for at least 20-30 minutes. I mean? The common consensus, yes we have a story to tell at the next BBQ, but it felt a little un-American, not to have any kind of refund or a gesture of good will from the tour company. And that's that.

Article by Peter Brooker | Photo by Richard Sagredo on Unsplash