Men's Mental Health: Starting the Year with Positive Habits

Today I want to share with you some of my thoughts and research on positive habits for the New Year ahead. I'm looking to cultivate some positivity in my own life, and am hoping this blog will be an extension of that. 

In a study published on the Priory, research tells us that 77% of men that were polled from a case study of 1000, have suffered with common mental health symptoms like anxiety, stress or depression. 40% of men polled said it would take thoughts of suicide or self-harm to compel them to seek professional help.

These are some scary numbers and first of, if you're feeling like life is getting too much but you don't know where to turn for professional help, you should consult your primary care doctor or make an appointment with a psychiatrist, psychologist or other mental health professional. There is also a page on the NHS website that will point you in the right direction. 

But let's get into it. 

Compare and Despair

One positive habit I'm trying to get into this year, is to tackle jealousy head on. But Carl, you're so talented and incredibly good looking I hear you say, why do you need to be jealous of anyone? Yes whilst all that might be true, I still have my trigger moments. 

But as the great actor turned philosopher Steve Guttenberg would say, 'compare and despair'. If you're looking at comparing yourself to others all the time, you will be living in a state of perpetual despair. When I'm scrolling through social media, and I see someone with better abs than me, or on holiday in a place I've always dreamed of going, I now think good for them. I don't tell them that of course, but I focus more on what I've got going which is a good set of abs myself, and I get to go on some wonderful holidays too. 

You have to be positive of what you have going on right now. The achievements that you've made in your life. How far you've come. These are things that matter. Sure, you may not be where you want to be in life right now, but staying positive is the kind of energy that gets you further than petty jealousy. 

Photo by Charlie Harrison Unsplash

Early Starts 

I know it's hard right now to get out of bed. It's so fucking cold all the time. But you need to prove to yourself, you can get up and make a difference every day. A difference to the quality of your own life and the those around you. Now you might think I can't get up any early than what I'm doing, to which I say, what is it that you're doing at night that is so productive? Can you get to bed earlier? Do you need to watch 2 hours of TV at night or can you get into bed earlier. 

My favourite time of day is in the morning hours around 5.30-6am when no is emailing me, or phoning me to do shit. I get to work on myself, or my projects or simply listen to some news that I'm interested in. Lately I've been stretching and doing some ab work in the mornings whilst I drink my coffee. Either way, I know if I miss the alarm or oversleep I'm constantly chasing my tail. I'm thinking why do I never have time to do what I want to do? So get your arse out of bed. Prepare your gym clothes the night before. Even make that smoothie the night before if you think the blender will wake up the wife. 

The 4/3 method

I speak to a lot of people during January about their drinking habits. Many are doing the dry January, others simply can't be bothered. They might cut down a little of their alcohol intake, but they're not really keeping to a routine or counting their units. 

I've adopted a 4/3 method for now that seems to be working for me. I have MON-THURS off drinking with no exceptions. Then Friday, Saturday and Sunday I enjoy myself a little more. I generally try and make a bottle of wine last 3 days. The worst thing you can do is open a bottle on the Sunday night and not finish it. I can't look at half a bottle of wine in the fridge for 3 days, it's too painful. 

So stick to a good system that works for you. Reducing your alcohol intake will help your skin, your sleep, your weight and of course, your wallet. 

Photo by Roman Krafton Unsplash

Less Bad News 

I think too many people are letting the bad news get to them. If you turn on the television right now, there are at least 2 land wars going on in Ukraine and Gaza. There is tension in Ecuador with drug cartels, China is threatening to swallow Japan and Kathy is having an affair on Phil in EastEnders. The last one I made up, but you get my point. There is bad news on the front cover of every paper, on the top story of every news channel. 

I'm not saying to ignore the news completely, but we're such sponges for fear mongering and we love to have the minute by minute commentary on what is happening in these countries. I'm saying you have to have some balance. When I'm walking the dogs for example, I have a 50/50 rule. I walk the dogs twice a day. In the morning I will get all my news on the troubling economy, the latest on the wars etc. But then when I'm walking them in the evening, I don't want to fill myself with all that anxiety before I go to bed. So I listen to some of my comedy podcasts, or something light like the football analysis. Something that doesn't get me down in the dumps. 

My own world has had enough bad headlines in the past year, I don't have enough capacity to fill myself with all the horrible news that is going on in the world. I think it's important to have some light relief. Don't forget to laugh, and smile, and say hello to strangers. Even the ones with their headphones in that are choosing to ignore you. Always say hello to the people that are picking up litter in the high vis vests. They need a smile more than anyone. Always buy something in the shop for the homeless guy that is camped outside, even if they don't see you drop it off at their feet. 

Little things like this, cost nothing. 

That's it for today. If anyone has some positive habits they wish to share, I'd love to hear about them. DM me on INSTA and I'll try and add them to this article over time.