Guest Post by Peter Brooker

Today I am going to give you the full inventory plus prices of my recent 4-day Easter break in Scotland that covered all the major must see places. You might want to also consider that this was a trip arranged over Easter Break, so prices could be inflated accordingly.

In Edinburgh we had two full days, and stayed at the Haymarket Hotel. I asked the young girl if she knew of any places in town where Sean Connery had lived or frequented. She replied, 'oh he stayed in the same room you're staying.'

I nearly fainted. 'Really?' I said astonished.

'No not really.' She said, and handed me the keys. The Haymarket Hotel is right next door to the tram stop, about 30 minutes from the airport. Extremely easy to get to and rests at the foot of a beautiful cobbled road that I did not venture up.

From there it's a brisk 30 minute walk to the castle, which I also didn't frequent. You've seen once castle you've seen them all and I've seen plenty. But we'll get on to one special castle shortly.

Things to do in Edinburgh

Back in 2021, you may have read a previous post on the Johnnie Walker experience. Various tiered pricing experiences are available but for an entry level ticket at £28 you will get 3 free cocktails and a 90 minute guided walk-through experience. For me you can't go wrong with Johnnie Walker Blue.

I can tell you, they have really gone to town to make this experience immersive. It puts all previous brewery and distillery tours to shame, and yes I am thinking exclusively of Fullers Brewery in Chiswick. I've never known a tour guide to retain so many statistics on the fermenting temperature of wort. Honestly, he should be on Mastermind.

Carlton Hill

Edinburgh's answer to the Parthenon. As described by Sean Connery in his promotional documentary for Edinburgh, which you can watch for free on the BFI player.

The gallery atop the hill is free, and there is amenities and a cafe which I didn't frequent as it was closed. But a beautiful monument. Although I don't think they should really describing it as an 'answer to the Parthenon.' The Parthenon is literally 50 times the size. It's like me building a sand castle out of heaped soil next in my garden and calling it 'my answer to Edinburgh Castle' and having it listed as one of the main attractions in Chiswick.

Arthur's Seat

From Carlton Hill it's a brisk walk over to Arthur's Seat, which is a free short hill climb with incredible vistas over the city. Though don't get too close to the edge instagrammers. Horrible story was told to me on the way up about a pregnant woman who was pushed to her death by her husband. Dogs are also welcome.

Camera Obscura

You will need to book ahead as time slots do go quite quickly on the weekend. There is a lot of quirky optical illusions that are mainly for kids, but admittedly, adults can get a kick out of too. The highlight is the main panoramic views in the dark room when you get to the top. It's quite magical, they display the entire city onto a circular dish. It's like sorcery or science, or something. I discovered this attraction and many more in Edinburgh through the Being a Scot autobiography by Sean Connery.

The Georgian House

Just round the corner from Princess Johnnie Walker Experience is 7 The Georgian House, a beautifully restored 18th Century Georgian House refurbished by The National Trust. Inside you'll get an idea on how the rich lived back in the day. A short introductory video revealed how much they must have smelled, how much they must have drank, and how much they were living beyond their means. 'Rather sell real estate in the country, than count the pennies in the city.'

£11 per ticket. No need to book. TIP: Don't try and play the piano unless you're really good. You won't get told off as such, just a little dressed-down.

The Luxley for Haggis Pie

A stone’s throw from The Georgian House and next to The Johnnie Walker Experience is The Luxley. The Haggis and Venison pie is a true winner and very reasonably priced. Just over £50 for two meals plus drinks. If you're looking for something a bit more fancy pants, the Ondine Fish Restaurant will be a perfect romantic meal for two. A sharing dish of all the sea food one could possibly imagine, available for £135 approx. Booking is recommended.

Off to Loch Ness

After a couple of days mooching around Edinburgh we got the tram back to the airport where he hired a car to Loch Ness. We went with Arnold Clark because they were the cheapest. We booked and paid ahead and were told the only proof of ID we needed was our drivers licence and photo. At the collection desk we were then asked to provide DVLA and National Insurance details to check how many points we had on our licence.

This was really strange, why not ask us all this before we paid for the rental online? Luckily my licence had a clean bill of health but it was really inconvenient to have to trawl through old emails and passwords to dig that information out for them. What if I hadn't been able to produce this information? They would have not have given us a car, (they said) and this would have really kyboshed our plans for the trip to Loch Ness to Fort Augustus and Fort William, hotels and tours booked etc. So not impressed with Arnold Clark, and rentals were £200 a day at least for a tiny Hyundai.

That said the drive up to Loch Ness is beautiful. You'll see many Loch's on the way and there are some (though not loads) of places to stop off for refreshments.

At Loch Ness

Understandably this was the most expensive place to stay on the trip. We had a very nice room, great shower, and great brekkie at White House Air BnB. The couple Ricky and his wife (didn't catch her name) were nice to talk to and informed us that they are building another resort close-by on the Loch. Hotels simply can't cope with demands in peak season at Loch Ness, especially at Fort Augustus.

We had a quick pint of Sheepshaggers Gold at a pub in town, and then popped on the Loch Cruise which was an hour excursion. (You will have to book online). It's cold out there on the Loch, so even if it's sunny, I recommend you go inside and get a window seat. We didn't catch a viewing of Nessie, and the tour guide was really inaudible over the tannoy, but just being out on that beautiful lake was a dream come true for me. I recommend booking a late afternoon tour, and setting off as early as possible from Edinburgh.

After the cruise on Loch Ness, we had dinner at the Boathouse that overlooks the Loch. Surprisingly it was empty, and we enjoyed some reasonably priced fish and chips and a Nessie Hot Pot. (Doubtful it contained any real Nessie). The waiting staff were all really young girls, and everyone felt awkward when I started making small talk with them. But decent grub, great views, two meals + dessert and a bottle of wine for around £60.

Eilean Donan Castle

Some will recognise the castle from The World is not Enough, but many will be familiar with the castle from the 1986 film, Highlander (for my money one of the best soundtracks to any film ever). The castle is actually a remake of one that the British Navy blew to smithereens some time ago. (Sorry about that). One of the Clan owners rebuilt it faithfully and the general public can enjoy a tour for £11.

Sadly no photos or filming are allowed inside the castle, but it's well worth the visit. It has some old coins, some old tartan garb and some framed photo stills of the movie Highlander. They didn't film inside, as the lady who owns the house won't shut the castle to the public for the purpose of filming. But they did shoot one scene for the Bond film, according to the tour guide. They shot that at night when the castle was closed, but only used the body doubles.

There is plenty of paid parking nearby, a gift shop and a cafe for refreshments. Cafes and eating houses are very thin on the ground in the village nearby so I would recommend eating there.

Off to Fort William

Next stop was Fort William. The town is very small and there is nothing to do worthy of note. However, it will break up the long drive back to Edinburgh and is a convenient place to stop as we hoped to hit Skyfall Road in Glencoe, (Glen Etive) on the way back. This is the road where Bond stopped off for a bit of sight-seeing with M, informing her quite prophetically that 'a storm is coming'.

We stayed at The Garrison Hotel which was not cheap. And not great. The bed and the sheets, and in fairness the breakfast, were much better than anticipated. The real let down was the WiFi was awful, there was a mishap with the laundry which meant we couldn't check in on time. It would have been nice if they offered us a courtesy beer for the inconvenience but was literally told, that's life.

The main fish restaurant, Crannog Seafood Restaurant was fully booked and the other pubs in the area were also full, and were very much of pub food quality judging by the menu. So we opted for an Indian opposite the hotel, Spice Tandori. I thought the food was top notch, but not luxury. And that's reflected in the price. Two drinks, two main meals, under £50. The service did not come with a smile, but hey, I'm not tipping so fair play.

Skyfall Road

The last stop on the journey back to Edinburgh was Skyfall Road in Glencoe, (Glen Etive). Yes this is from the movie Skyfall as I previously explained. Now there is no sign that indicates the spot, and the road meanders down to a beautiful parking spot at the foot of a loch.

The road is one lane, but there are several passing lay-by's. Sadly I didn't locate the exact spot, I think it's within a 1/3rd of the way down. There is no parked DB5 or cardboard cut outs of Bond and M to signify the exact spot so I can't help you I'm afraid. All I would say is the road is about 30 minutes to the loch, and 30 minutes back obviously. So if you're looking to add this detour to your journey, be sure to put on a TOM FORD suit and put an hour aside.

Conclusion

I hope this article helps and gives you some idea of what to do in some of the most beautiful locations in Scotland. If you need any help plotting your road trip, please DM me on Instagram. Happy to help.

Main Photo by George Hiles on Unsplash